Continuous struggling
by: K.L

I looked out the window...I couldn't see the sun because of the dark hovering clouds above the roof of our apartment. The clouds reminded me of how i felt inside...dark, gloomy, and very unclear. I sometimes just couldn't understand why i felt like that most of the time, but maybe it was because of a certain person. I don't really want to get into depth about this "person" at all or else i would begin to feel like the sky again. But i knew that this feeling wasn't normal. I never used to have such sad expressions and bleak emotions toward others before. 'Maybe it's a stage,' some people would tell me...but i doubt it is. It FEELS like this feeling would stay with me forever...no matter what i do. --------next paragraph------> It was just an ordinary day at home...everyone out of the building whilst i sit in depression and sadness. Everyone that cared about my feelings before, had lost interest in what was to come next of my secluded personality.(For it wasn't that hard to predict what was going to happen.) they'd just ignore me or sit away from me knowing of my presence. This little fact is what brings me to the strong foundation of my story. "The loneliest people can achieve quite interesting factors important to the higher archy of human life" <--- if you don't understand that, it pretty much just means, "Even people that are alone can still do great wonders and dont have to rely on others to make it there." people kind of like me. Even though day in and day out, I'm surrounded by people that i know...my friends...i still feel like i dont belong. It's quite a common feeling among those in their teen-hood. (Again, people like me.) I only have one thing that can tear me away from the hurt of real life. My art. It's the one and only thing that "keeps me alive" as many would say. It's the thing that makes me wake up in the morning and go to the Social Status Area (in other words, "school") to be knocked around by blondes and people who feel it's their duty to be better than me in every way possible. People like "Bob." We'll just call her Bob because i don't really feel like being attacked right here, right now by mentioning her name. But i know who she is, and you will know her as the infamous ~Bob~. Now Bob is the reason that CONTRASTS my idea of waking up in the morning for school. She's like a peice of gum. A piece of discustingly pink, chewed about 300,000 times, and raked in dirt kind of scum...excuse me, i ment "gum" that you just can't scrape off with a rock. Instead, she's the kind of gum you need to rip off with hateful words. That's the reason why, in a metaphorical world, i can't get her off my shoe. ------next paragraph-----> But enough about metaphors and such. Let's get deeper in the stab wound which is also my heart and mind. I'm really not a bad person, it's just sometimes i can't control my emotions and act without thought or feeling. That, my friends, is what led me to my mood...the mood i was describing. Sometimes...i just feel like giving up. Like giving up on things i know i have no chance with. This mood i am in has possessed me to feel this way many, many times. More than i could possibly count in a matter of 10 seconds. For most of it, i can credit to the gum on my shoes also known as Bob. As you probably have found out by now, i don't fancy Bob at all. "One of these days, you dont know what will hit you"